A Change of Pace

Though I need to keep posting about TM in order to process and deal, I'm sick of doing so at the present moment, so I'll share other news.

My mom is in Mexico right now!!! She's spending three weeks living with a family outside of Mexico City doing some community organizing work and taking intensive Spanish classes. And this is for course credit. Yes, my mom is in school as well.

This is the first time my mom has been out of the country in many, many years. All three of her daughters have been to some combination of Europe, South America, Africa, Central America, and the Caribbean...some of us have been to all five. She has only been to Jamaica, Bermuda, and Canada. My mom is the personification of making sure the next generation accomplishes more than the one before.

I am so impressed with her strength to keep learning and growing.

Happy New Year, Y'all!

I have been allergic to my computer for the past couple of weeks. The idea of using my laptop for anything, even checking email, has created a strange reaction. I'm sure this is due to the fact that I used my laptop every single day of last semester.

What that means is that even when I had plenty of opportunities to post while spending Christmas at The Ranch, I didn't want to. So to sum up, it was a great time. TM's family actually got me presents...which I didn't expect...and I didn't have to work as hard with the cows. It was very cool to see all the calves I worked with over the summer all grown up and almost as big as their mothers. I was able to meet the last of TM's family and got to know other family members better. Lots of great food was consumed.

One funny story: it's cold there. Very cold. Negative temperatures were often reported. We would wake up and it would be 15 degrees below or 22 degrees below. I went running one morning and frost formed on my eyelashes. I had to keep wiping my eyes in order to open and close them.

So, it's a New Year. As you may know, I try to avoid resolutions and instead work under a yearly theme...like this one and this one. This time I do have specific goals I want to accomplish, but I still need a theme. So this year, my theme is to Not Get Complacent. This year is going to be rough, and it would be easy for me to blame Harvard for not doing anything else but going to classes and writing papers. But I do want to keep doing things: like exercising, like moving forward on non-course requirements of my degree, like keeping my weight down.

So my theme will be my personal kick-in-the-pants so that I keep my head out of my ass. Wish me luck!

That's What I'm Talking About!

create your own personalized map of the USA

TM and I just got in the door about 30 minutes ago from our cross-country trip. Luckily, our bodies, souls and relationship survived the six days and over 2,800 miles. And now I have so many more states that I can say I visited! I had to include Utah and Arizona because those are two of the Four Corners I mentioned earlier. I have now seen 56% of the country.

Off to bed! I'm going to try and avoid getting in any car for at least one day!

Catching Up

So much has been going on. It doesn't help that so much that goes on happens in the car, so I can't post about it.

So...quick recap. I'm no longer in Colorado. We left on Monday. The rest of my time there was pretty calm compared to the days working with the cows. I saw a play produced by a local repertory theatre...it was alright. I kept thinking, "I could direct something here." I went to a Catholic wedding where TM and his family performed the music for the ceremony. I met more family, ate more steak and just hung out.

Now TM and I are on our cross-country journey. We are heading back to NYC via the South. We went back to Albuquerque to see yet another aunt and her family, then traveled 12 hours to Austin, TX to visit...that's right...another aunt and uncle. TM's family is huge! That's where I am now.

I can't actually believe that I'm in Texas. I've seen so much just looking through my window. It's beautiful and scary...someone had Ole Dixie flying high over their business. I also ate at my first Sonic. I kept seeing the commercials in New York and never caught on that everyone was always in cars. Now I get the whole Sonic concept!

Note to Quel: I'm so sorry I didn't give you a head's up about being in Austin. I thought that we were only staying here one night, but we got in so late that we decided to stay an extra day. We'll be out on 6th Street tonight, though I don't know where yet. I absolutely love your city, by the way.

Since we decided to stay, I took full advantage. I went for a run around Town Lake this morning and was impressed by how many women were exercising. I washed my hair...always an endeavor... and now am going to sit in the sun room they built and read the new Harry Potter novel while it dries. Tonight, we're going to a rib house and checking out some live music. I'm very excited. I'm really digging Austin...I mean really digging it.

Our next stop will be New Orleans. Neither of us have ever been there, so any suggestions on a place to get good food and good music?

That Wasn't Really My First Cattle Drive

I thought it was...but after what I did later that afternoon and the next day, the events described in my previous post were nothing but child's play.

After lunch and a nap to calm me down, we went back to the corral where all the cows were. We had several tasks:

1. Sort out the calves that didn't have an ear tag. These calves had been born recently and needed to be tagged, vaccinated and castrated if they were males. More on that later.

2. Separate the cows that didn't have the brand of The Ranch on them. These were cows that didn't belong to TM's family, but had probably tagged along during a previous cattle drive. They needed to be returned to their owner.

3. Separate the steers (boy cows without balls) from the bulls (boy calves with balls), so that they wouldn't fight during this process.

We actually did all these things. I helped sort the cows from the calves by waving my arms around, chasing them, and saying "HAAH!" a lot. We got the ten untagged calves separated and put them in a chute one-by-one ...see left. Once they were there, TM's cousin tied a rope around their outside back leg and pulled it...hard...so that we would have access to the calves' balls. Then, TM's dad poked and prodded until he was sure both balls were dangling. Then I held them down as TM's dad put a very strong rubber band around their base. Blood flow will stop and in a couple of weeks, their balls will shrivel up and drop off. TM tells me that you often see calf balls strewn around a pasture where they've been grazing. Crazy!

I also gave a couple of them ear tags with numbers and stuck a very big needle under their skin to give them their vaccinations. They have very thick skin, by the way. It was a bizarre experience, unlike anything I've ever done. I was exhausted at the end of the day.

However...it wasn't over. The next morning, we all woke up at 6am to do a real cattle drive. All those cows we sorted and worked with the day before got moved to a pasture 4 miles away. We walked in "rattlesnake country"...luckily I didn't see any, passed by carcasses of elk and cows and deer, even walked in the highway! It took about an hour and a half to move about 200 cows. I tell you...cows are dumb! You have to really simplify your logic to get them to do what you want.

Once they were in the new pasture, TM and I spent the rest of the afternoon fixing barbed wire fences so the cows wouldn't get off the land. I've never slept so hard in my life. The 5K run, the hikes, the 11,000 feet cabin...nothing was as tiring on my body as the work I did with the cows.

News Flash!

I have been remiss in posting...I apologize. I do have crazy stories to tell, including one where I help castrate several male calves by pulling their balls down so that a rubber band can be placed on them like a tourniquet so they fall off. No joke.

However, I must inform all those that know TM that at approximately 11:30pm on this day, TM cut all his hair off. Again...no joke. He just got sick of it and so his mother put his hair in a 10-inch long braid and cut it off. Now his hair is right below his ears. We're donating the braid to Locks of Love.

None of us really know how to cut hair, so on our way to start our cross-country trip back to the East Coast, TM and I will stop at a barber's to help shape it.

Can you believe it?

UPDATE: TM went to a mall hair salon in Santa Fe, NM and he got a $20 haircut to shape up the girl bob that emerged after his mother cut his ponytail off. I was worried, but it turned out fantastic. He's always been handsome to me, but now he looks even more so. He looks the same as well. It's weird. It's him...only handsomer.

Hikes

Being right in the middle of the Rocky Mountains means that you a lot of hiking. I have already been on three hikes at least an hour long since I've been. Here is what you see during them:

Hike #1: A waterfall in Conejos Canyon.








































I actually didn't get any pictures during my second hike. It wasn't that high. But there was beautiful valley filled with light green plants.

Hike #3: At Mesa Verde.
































I think I'm all done with hikes for a while, which means I have to back to running. Ah well.

My First Cattle Drive

The Ranch is a cattle ranch. They raise cows naturally for healthier beef. TM's family has been doing it for generations...like since America was created out here.

So as part of my "initiation" into TM's family, I had to do some work on the farm. The mission of TM, his mom, and I was to move at least 100 cows and calves from a very huge field into a pen a half a mile away.

It started out great. The cows were really funny. They would stare at me all tough, but as soon as I walked toward them and said, "HAH!" they went running. I saw a calf one day old, with its umbilical cord still attached.

When the cows were moving, everything was all good. We all had to spread out to keep them moving in the right direction, so there were times when I was handling a whole side of the herd by myself...which was fine when they were moving. But there was one time when the herd wasn't being pushed. Then they started to get rowdy and I started to get nervous. I actually started freaking out and was screaming across the mooing cows for help. You have to scream because the sound of 100 mooing cows is VERY loud. It also didn't help that some of the bulls were trying to hump the ladies and would break out of the herd. This is normal, apparently, but no one told me that, so I kept yelling at them to stop and break it up. This didn't help my freaking-outness.

I am still a bit shaken up by the whole experience, but I don't think it would benefit me to share how scared I was. In fact, that I tried to break up some cow loving will probably become a funny tale to tell around the dinner table. You have to have a thick skin to live on a ranch, that's for sure.

We aren't done with our work with the cows, so I'll have another chance with them.

Sorting It Out

There has been so much I've seen during this vacation...and I have a week left! I'm still sorting through a plethora of emotions and thoughts about TM, family, race, friendship, education, cows, the non-East Coast part of America, dogs that live outside all the time, altitude adjustments, driving everywhere, Native American reservations...the list goes on.

However, based on a comment by tuckergurl, I realize I may not have been completely clear on my itinerary thus far. Probably because TM has been the cruise director for this entire trip. I just ask him should I bring a bathing suit and get in the car.

So, here's a blow-by-blow of the places I've been in the past seven days.

Day 1: Denver; Fort Collins, CO
Day 2: Fort Collins, CO; Taos, NM
Day 3: Taos; Albuquerque; Santa Fe; the ranch TM grew up on, aka The Ranch
Day 4: The Ranch; Manassa, CO (it was here that I ran the 5K); a cabin 11,000 feet in the Rocky Mountains
Day 5: The cabin; The Ranch; Alamosa, CO
Day 6: The Ranch; Albuquerque, NM; Durango, CO
Day 7 (today): Durango, CO; Utah, Colorado, New Mexico and Arizona at the same time*; Mesa Verde, CO; Pagosa Springs, CO; The Ranch.

*I was able to be in all those states at the same time because I went to Four Corners. It's the only place in America where you can do this.

As you can see, it's been a whirlwind of a trip. I am thrilled that we are spending the second half of this trip at The Ranch. Tomorrow night will be the first night that I get to sleep in the same bed two nights in a row. I am also thrilled that I've loved every second of it. I'm having a blast.

Now that I've sorted through the places I've been, perhaps I'll be better able to sort through the things I've seen. I'll keep you posted...or at the very least I'll post pictures.

5K at 7,000 Feet

I am so glad I'd been running more consistently in the weeks before this trip. I am even more grateful for the run I made myself do in Taos. Since I've been on the ranch that TM grew up on, I have been do a LOT of walking uphill at high altitudes.

The ultimate occurred yesterday morning when TM's sister and I ran a 5K race. It was part of an annual festival in the local town. Everyone knew I was a runner...because everyone in this family knows everything about me! But that's for another post. So when his sister asked, I thought why not? I wanted to put in another run and this would be a great way for me to bond with his sister.

So I ran a little over three miles yesterday morning at an altitude of about 7,000 feet. It was hard as hell! My 28-minute run felt like 58 minutes. But I accomplished something I never would have in New York...I placed! I came in fifth in my age bracket! The medal is now in my luggage. I'm wicked proud I finished the race with a pace faster than a 10-minute mile. I am also very wicked proud that I placed.

Of course, the country was beautiful and there were even more picturesque views of the Rockies.

The rest of the day was spent hiking and camping at an altitude of 11,000 feet. Good times!

Recipe for Loving This Country

I've discovered the secret for loving America without bitterness or cynicism. The key is to see it. I know, I know...duh! I always considered myself a well-traveled person, but I recently discovered that I had barely seen the country I was born in. Two days in a different time zone has made me appreciate the diversity of landscape that is this country.

I am currently in Taos, NM. But I have also been in Denver and Ft. Collins, CO in the last two days. I am on vacation with TM where we'll be spending a couple of weeks with his friends and family. I have to say, I was/am a bit nervous about meeting his clan...because he has a very big family...but so far, we are having a marvelous time. Lots of laughing, good food and great views. The Rocky Mountains are astounding and it is very loopy to be dealing with a two-hour time difference while adjusting to being higher than a mile above sea level. My 20-minute-run yesterday felt like I ran for an hour.

I will try to post some pictures when I can; this is going to be whirlwind trip. Did I also mention that we're driving back to the East Coast? I'll keep you posted.

I Vacationed on the Middle Finger

I got back from my mini-vacation last night. Ella and I spent a quick 48 hours at a lake house on Seneca Lake...the middle finger of the Finger Lakes...with my family. Boy, did I need it! There have been things weighing heavy on my heart and I needed to get away from them to get some perspective. It was very easy to get that perspective on the deck of a house that overlooks a beautiful lake surrounded by trees.

I was there with my dad, brother, s'mom and the people I jokingly call "my white family," whom I adore. They include my s'mom's dad, my s'mom's brother, his wife and their three children. Since my dad and s'mom have been together so long, our families know each other really well. I love introducing people to one of my blond cousins with no explanation. Good times...

One reason I love my s'mom so much is that she is so supportive without being condescending. She isn't someone who will tell me everything I do is fine, but she listens wholeheartedly and that relaxes me. When we talk, I feel like she's totally there for me and I'm all there for her. I've learned more about my dad in the last few years through her than in my entire life through him. So the first thing I did when I arrived was grab her and talked some stuff out. It was a short conversation, but it was all I needed.

Another reason why I love this part of my family is that it is perfectly acceptable to do absolutely nothing. I didn't do a damn thing; there were moments where the living room was filled with people and we were all quiet. It was good practice for me.

The trip was awesome. Ella saw a lake for the first time and went swimming...she didn't like it. She saw a donkey, a miniature horse and two real horses for the first time as well. She didn't walk on concrete for three days. Good times...

It was also the first trip where the drive was actually part of the vacation. In order to save gas, I didn't speed through the way I usually do. And in turn, I saw beautiful vistas. I went through an area in Pennsylvania called the "Endless Mountain Region." The air was so sweet and clean up there, I didn't need the A/C at all. Ella loved the feel of the air on her face. With the beauty of cruise control, I could put my feet up and just drive. There were stretches of Route 81 where there was not another car in sight. Good times!

I didn't take any pictures...though Ella was hilarious as she tried to fit all four paws on one rock to avoid getting into the water. I wanted to be in the present and not think about the future. I think I succeeded...we'll see how long the perspective lasts.